call me dull

10 of the all-time worst gay sex scenes in movie history

The Academy Awards are finally here, and Call Me By Your Name is in the running for four major awards (it t already took home top voting honors in the 2018 Queerties). Rooting for you, Timothee!

With the 17-year-old-character’s scene involving a peach sparking debate, we thought it a good time to take a look back at homo-sex in cinema. Ironically, latter-day queer classics like Call Me or Brokeback Mountain get their own share of criticism from queer audiences–for not having enough gay sex or for the sex not being graphic or real enough.

There is some merit to these criticisms. Many gay films, including Call Me, seem skittish when they get to the inevitable sex scene, creating a huge double standard as opposite sex gets more explicit by the year. I mean, when the sexiest scene in the movie involves penetrating a small fruit you know things could be a bit hotter.

However, sometimes caution can be good. Because full-on sex scenes are easily botched, leaving audiences frustrated and ignorant of the erotic possibilities.

Click through to see our list of the worst gay sex scenes in movies and watch these titles at your own risk!

Shame

Observers tend to make a big deal about Oscar-nominated hunk Michael Fassbender showing off his oscar in this film about a sex addict. Yes, he goes full frontal, and yes he has  sex—some very bad sex. At a particularly low point, Fassbender’s character ends up in a sex club, looking to hook up with whatever he can. What transpires doesn’t titillate so much as make us want to take a shower in bleach. We love naked Fassbender, but the scene left us less titillated and more than a bit nauseated.

Shame streams on Amazon, iTunes and Vudu.

Wet Hot American Summer

The cult comedy earned a good deal of buzz for featuring a gay affair between two campers, played by Bradley Cooper and Michael Ian Black. Now granted, some people get turned on at the idea of doing it in a tool shed, even when played for laughs. We respectfully disagree.

Wet Hot American Summer streams on Amazon, YouTube, iTunes and Vudu.

Rules of Attraction

Brett Easton Ellis penned the original novel Rules of Attraction as a sort of semi-sequel to American Psycho, which itself has homoerotic overtones. The film version of Attraction features some of the most irritating gay characters in recent memory. Worse, the movie punts on gay sex, substituting a surreal dance number to George Michael‘s “Faith”.

In a movie that wants to be shocking, the scene exposes the skittishness of the filmmakers.

Rules of Attraction streams on Hulu, YouTube, iTunes, Vudu and Amazon.

Requiem for a Dream

This one goes out to the ladies in the house: Darren Aronofsky’s masterpiece about addiction features some characters doing some pretty awful things to get their fix. That includes Jennifer Connelly’s character, who agrees to perform sex with hooker featuring a double headed dildo. It was enough to scare anyone into never trying drugs—or sex with women—again.

Requiem for a Dream streams on Hulu, iTunes, YouTube, Vudu and Amazon.

J. Edgar

With a script by Dustin Lance Black, and leads played by Leonardo DiCaprio and Armie Hammer, you’d think that J. Edgar, the biopic of the kinda-closeted-but-not FBI director, could show a bit of homo sex. The film’s one love scene plays more like something out of Fight Club, yet somehow less homoerotic. Edgar and love interest Clyde share a kiss then proceed to beat the crap out of each other before confessing mutual love. A scene of the two watching lawn sprinklers might have been more erotic.

J. Edgar streams on YouTube, Amazon, iTunes and Vudu.

Related: Is this gay sex scene in ‘Call Me By Your Name’ the hottest ever to hit the big screen?

Cruising

The notorious thriller set in the S&M scene caused an uproar back in 1980, despite (or perhaps because of) the presence of young Al Pacino and Oscar-winning director William Friedkin. Loaded with ostensible man-on-man sex which invariably turns to graphic violence, we nominate any given frame of the movie as some of the worst gay sex in cinema history.

Cruising streams on YouTube, Amazon, iTunes and Vudu.

Six Degrees of Separation

Now Six Degrees of Separation hardly qualifies as a bad movie. It falters, though, in the lead performance by Will Smith as a gay hooker. Smith (allegedly under the advice of Denzel Washington) refused to kiss other men, making the film’s sex scenes a bit hollow as a result. Smith has grown into a fine actor. If he’d have had more courage at the time, Six Degrees might not only have become a classic, but Smith might have gotten the kind of adult roles that earned him respect much sooner in his career.

Six Degrees of Separation streams on Hulu, Amazon and iTunes.

Bruno

Yes, ok, Bruno is supposed to be funny. Still, we gagged more than laughed at the film’s sex scenes which involve an Asian twink, a fire extinguisher, and an exercise bike.

Bruno streams on YouTube, iTunes, Showtime on Demand, Amazon and Vudu.

Wild Things

Anybody who remembers the 90s likely remembers the sensation that this dud thriller caused—not for its scares, but for a girl on girl scene involving Denise Richards and Neve Campbell. Call it Hollywood lesbian exploitation at its worst. And remember, we’ve seen Showgirls.

Wild Things streams on YouTube, Amazon, iTunes and Vudu.

The Fan

Young Michael Biehn made us swoon, though his role as a gay stalker/killer in The Fan somehow managed to turn us on even less than when he gets splattered with acid in Aliens. Reinforcing the cinematic stereotype that gay people are maniacal killers, Biehn slices up a victim while receiving oral sex. Yeah, for those of us wanting to oogle Biehn’s square-jawed handsomeness, stick to more erotic films–like Aliens or The Terminator.

The Fan streams on YouTube, Amazon, iTunes and Vudu.

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22 Comments*

  • jjose712

    Rules of attraction can’t be a sequel of American Psycho because it was published first (and the characters are younger). Maybe a sequel of Less than zero

    • bushwickfreddy

      Darling, you don’t actually think Queerty contributors actually do fact-checking before they post a story do you?

    • andy0529

      Your right both counts.

    • Motard

      You’re not incorrect, however:
      1) The order of publishing of the source material has no bearing on the screen continuity of their film adaptations
      2) Psycho is identifiably set in the 80’s, as is Rules
      3) If we can imagine the two movies as roughly contemporaneous, the order of their release defines Rules as a sequel though the only real continuity between them is the Bateman family.
      4) The age of the characters has no bearing on the relationship of the films’ continuity.

  • DuMaurier

    Michael Biehn’s character in “The Fan” wasn’t gay. He picked up a gay man to kill him and fake his own suicide.

    • Rob91316

      Correct! Thank you for beating me to the punch in pointing that out!

  • mz.sam

    Thank you Queerity for brilliant list. ‘Moonlight’, an LGBT masterpiece. ‘Call Me Over-rated’…Buh, bye, Peaches!

    • jpcolter

      Bullshit. CMBYN is far better than Moonlight.

    • leobaga

      Cmbyn is for smart people. You wouldn’t understand. A beautiful film.

  • john.k

    I’m surprised that the comment on “Cruising” nominates “any given frame” for worst sex scene because some of the scenes showed actual sex. They were filmed in an actual S&M club – The Mineshaft I think. In one scene you can clearly see that a guy in the background is being fisted. OK, it’s filmed from an angle so that it is not explicit but there is no doubt about what is going on.

  • chris_clb614

    Wholly disagree on Shame, where Fassbender’s character has difficulties with actual intimacy- that’s sort of the point. And while I don’t seek out lesbian makeout scenes, the one in Wild Things was a wowzer. And when someone in the movie shows their Bacon (wink, wink), it’s not a dud.

    • paul peniscocker

      I am totally there with you on Wild Things. It was a hot scene. I think Wild Things should be looked at as a film with the tone of Melrose Place with an R rating. It was a fun movie, not some piece of total realism.

  • CanadianGuy62

    First of all (re: Wet Hot American Summer) it is “grant it,” not “granted.” One takes things for granted; grant it, just because you’re a “writer,” you can’t necessarily be expected to know this.

    Seriously…please try at least a façade of journalist integrity (that can start with knowing the language in which you’re writing).

    Now to my main point…did anyone else find the peach scene simply underwhelming? Maybe it was built-up so much that I had high expectations, I don’t know.

    • geb1966

      I am not sure what they teach you in Canada, but as a 20+ year English professor at the university level, I can assure you that the writer used the expression correctly. I recommend you check your own knowledge of the language before you call someone else out on theirs.

    • CanadianGuy62

      geb1966 I stand corrected and (not being facetious one iota) humbly apologise to the author.

      All these years, I was honestly under the impression that one takes things for granted while you grant (it) that you accept a fact or principle.

      Mea culpa.

  • Puckersnique

    I love the scene in “Wet Hot American Summer” because it’s sweet, loving and the one moment in the entire film (one of my favorites, btw) that ISN’T played for laughs.

  • sejjo

    How do you define ‘the worst’? If you mean the sex scene isn’t sexy enough or enjoyable for the viewer, then Shame achieved its objective. This is a movie about sex addiction. Sex addiction is not sexy and the sex addict hurts himself whenever he surrenders to his addiction. As the audience, we were meant to feel his pain.

  • Paulie P

    CMBYN….why isn’t it on this list? Oh right cause the movie is boring as fuck and I’m one a the few that thinks so.

  • Heywood Jablowme

    “… Will Smith as a gay hooker. Smith (allegedly under the advice of Denzel Washington) refused to kiss other men,”

    Do hookers kiss? (Clients, I mean. ) Really? I don’t know from experience, but I’d have thought they DON’T kiss clients, and hardly anyone would expect them to? Aren’t they hired for, um, other skills?

    As for sex in a tool shed, don’t knock it til you’re tried it!

    • CastleSF

      Sex in a tool shed? Are we supposed to understand what that means?

  • paul peniscocker

    Rules of attraction the film, partly did not keep the gay scenes from the book because of Ian Somerhalder’s objection. On the only scene that is in there of them kissing, he told them he would only do one take.

  • Kevan1

    Sad, Hollywood has most always depicted all gays into leather, murder, rape and all forms of depravity and mental illness. Only in more recent years have they given gays some positivity in movies.
    Born in the late sixties, I always was interested in sneaking to watch movies with any gay content. I repeatedly was disappointed at all the gay characters being almost less than human. I was angered by this because I knew before I knew any gay people that I myself was not that person on the big screen and I naturally assumed I was not the only gay person who was not an evil f-cked up psychopath.
    I agree there is a need to show more real and even at least as explicit as straight sex scenes with gay and lesbian characters. I know showing gays as normal as their straight counterparts is dull, but most of us are normal and abnormal as any heterosexual. I guess that does not sell tickets at the theater. I must say it is better than it used to be.
    I need to also mention that I do not think the leather culture is a bad thing, it is just not all gays are into leather just as not all gays like dressing in drag or are effeminate. We are a mixture of all these things. None of these things are good or bad except for portraying all gays as psychos and crazies.

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