promises to keep

Rep. Mark Kirk Will Never Lie Again!

I have made mistakes concerning certain aspects of my accomplishments and experiences, and I apologize for those mistakes and I pledge to correct those errors. I am not perfect and was careless. I will do better and I will make sure this never happens again.

—Illionis Rep. Mark Kirk, the serial fabricator hoping to claim Roland Burris’ U.S. Senate seat, apologizing for misleading you on his military accolades (claiming awards he was never given personally), coming under enemy fire (disputed by comrades), his teaching and nursery school gigs, and violating military code by remaining politically active while on duty. Not addressed: His sexuality, because who really needs to throw DADT — which he opted not to vote to repeal — into the mix? [via]