Pumpkin-Spice-cappuccino mixYou may want to consider buying stock in Starbucks because we have a feeling it’s about to take off.

Queerty recently conducted a survey where we looked at the correlation between how often our readers got laid and how many pumpkin spice lattes they consumed each month and the results will likely disappoint you.

Related: Starbucks CEO: If You Don’t Like Our Support For Marriage Equality “Buy Shares In Another Company”

Approximately 3,000 Queerty readers took our survey. Of that number, 2,471 readers (84 percent) reported that they do not drink pumpkin space lattes, compared to 488 (16 percent) who said that they do. 37 (1 percent) chose not to answer the question.

So how exactly does that bode for your sex life? According to our figures, not so great.

1,425 readers (48 percent) reported to have had sex zero to two times in the last month. Of that 48 percent, 1,353 (95 percent) also reported to have consumed a total of zero to two pumpkin spice lattes in the last 30 days.

Related: Anti-Gay Pastor Is Terrified Of Drinking Semen, Especially In Starbucks Lattes

Oddly, however, when asked how likely they would be to have sex with someone who dislikes pumpkin spice lattes, 1,630 Queerty readers (56 percent) said they would be more likely to sleep with that person, compared to 1,271 (44 percent) who said that they would be less likely.

Clearly, there’s a discrepancy between people’s perceived feelings towards the sexiness of pumpkin spice lattes and the actual reality.

So what’s the takeaway from all this? Well, unfortunately, it’s not great for the vast majority of you Queerty readers who don’t drink pumpkin spice lattes. Your distain towards the seasonal delight may be saving you calories, but it’s costing you sex partners.

Related: Queerty Applauds Starbucks For Giving NOM A Very Respectful Bitch-Slap

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