A man with spiky gray dyed hair and the sides of his head shaved stands looking at a smartphone screen shocked in front of a nondescript white building. He has a thin black mustache, tattoos on his left hand which is perched under his chin, and wears a navy blue collared shirt with breast pockets.

Is anyone else craving a sandwich all of the sudden?

In the latest instance of unintentional social-media horniness, submarine sandwich chain Jersey Mike’s got more than they bargained for after one of their posts reached Gay Twitter X.

On the surface, their ploy for engagement was innocuous enough: “If you were a sub, what sub would you be?”

It was likely an invite for followers to champion their favorite combos, like the Original Italian, Stickball Special, or the Super Sub. (LOL.)

But come on! They had to know what they were doing, right? Someone get the gay social-media intern on the phone.

Nevertheless, it didn’t take long for LGBTQ+ users and submissives alike to find the post (which has received 1.1 million-plus views) and run with it like the good boys and girls they are.

The sub discussion also provided a good opportunity to revisit some of our favorite bottoms sandwich lovers of the past few years, including part-time top Troye Sivan and Jonathan Bailey, who certainly showcased his taste for foot longs in Fellow Travelers.

Surprisingly enough, an influx of Supernatural fans also chimed in with mentions of Jensen Ackles’ character Dean Winchester, an apparent bratty sub. (No idea what that’s about, but we’re intrigued.)

Still, a few doms Good Samaritans did their best to warn Jersey Mike’s of the impending flood of innuendos, going as far as discipling the brand using its “government name” –– New Jersey Michael.

That being said, this isn’t the first time that Jersey Mike’s has baited the gays with visions of meat.

Apparently, the brand once tweeted “How do you top your sub?” according to a viral meme.

(Although there’s no record of the original post on X anymore, their account wrote “How would you top it?” alongside a pic of condiments back in 2018, which is… not much better.)

Then again, their social media manager might just be following a marketing trend of getting gay –– and unhinged –– online.

Remember when Pabst Blue Ribbon went AWOL and tweeted, “Not drinking this January? Try eating ass.” (The brand eventually deleted the post and apologized for “poor judgment.”)

And even more recently, Vaseline inadvertently posted hole on main while trying to advertise a healing jelly product. Oop!

Double entendres aside, the best response was one that sidestepped BDSM entirely to recall one of the most unhinged news stories of last year: the Titanic submersible.

(“Imploded & lying at the bottom of the ocean,” @d0ntaeme wrote in response.)

Will Jersey Mike’s eventually cave to the horniness and delete the post, as a means of shutting up Gay Twitter X and avoiding hole pics?

Only time will tell, but at least we know every sub at the shop will be treated prepared Mike’s Way®.

More importantly, we’re just biding our time until a sandwich competitor weighs in.

Is Jimmy John a dom or sub? And where do the Potbelly’s pigs factor in? We need answers!

Check out more hilarious (and horny) responses from social-media gays below.

Don't forget to share:

Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told...

We can't rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That's why we don't lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?

Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated