“Trump Tower Live” Is A Total Stinking Mess


Like the festering dead mouse for which it is named, Trump Tower Live is apparently pretty unbearable.

The whole point of Trump’s run for office was not, of course, for him to win — he has no interest in being President, don’t be ridiculous. It’s all been a marketing tool for his soon-to-launch “Trump TV” network, where he can squeeze money out of his sad scared supporters.

But the test-run for the network doesn’t seem to be going too well. For the last few days, they’ve been doing Facebook livestreams that are barely watchable, even if you love Trump.

For one thing, they never start on time — the show is always delayed. The hosts are a bunch of nobodies who have no on-screen charisma. The backdrop for their chatter looks like a high school study hall. And, get this, there are commercials. Yup, commercial breaks in a Facebook livestream. Oh, lord. The whole thing sounds like the most dismal broadcast in the history of motion pictures. (If you’re looking for a more engaging livestream to watch, consider Jeffery Self Live, or the queer gamer livestream next weekend that doubles as a fundraiser for charity.)

If things were going well for the campaign, we would probably be telling a different story. But Trump’s dismal electoral performance is undermining his ability to attract talent, and so you have only the craziest weirdos working for him these days.

When this election is over, hopefully Trump will have notched another series of failures under his belt, and the family can go back to what they do best: killing animals and spreading STDs.

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