For gay and queer men, a nude can certainly get the ball rolling with sexual and even romantic relationships. But not everyone is willing to send their X-rated pics to just anyone.
On Reddit’s r/gay subreddit this month, one user asked, “Why are dudes so obsessed with nudes? … Why are guys so surprised or hurt when I say I’m not comfortable taking pics and sending them?”
And in the comment section, other Reddit users tried to explain this explicit expectation. “Because masturbation,” one person wrote in the top-voted comment.
“Great question,” another Redditor added. “To be honest, I just like looking at bodies.”
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Indeed, several Reddit commenters said they simply enjoy gazing upon the human form. “I just like how the male body looks—d*ck, balls, shoulders, nipples, chest, the whole thing. So nudes are enjoyable for me,” one wrote.
Related: Photographer Blake Little releases his first, stunning book of nudes
Another person remarked, “I can’t speak for every guy, but for me, it was mostly curiosity about what other guys were packing and how it differed from myself. Though I was always respectful if someone didn’t want to share nudes. I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea.”
One commenter said he enjoys sharing a dirty little secret, so to speak, with a dude.
“Imagine receiving a photo that nobody else has about something that isn’t allowed to be showed everywhere. It’s kind of forbidden, and forbidden tastes best.”
But in a dissenting vote, another commenter said he finds nearly-nude photos hotter than fully-NSFW pics: “I find it way sexier when someone sends me a pic in sexy underwear with just a hint of pubes or butt showing. It’s like the difference of getting to unwrap a present on your birthday and having someone just hand you something and say it’s your gift.”
Delving deeper, one Reddit user observed that nudes speak to a prospective hookup’s potential.
“Good nudes or semi-nude pictures (not the ‘perfect’ Twitter/OnlyFans ones) kinda tell me how sexual and sensual someone can be,” that guy explained. “If I’m talking with a bottom who knows how good his ass looks and is proud to show it, I’m even more inclined to have sex with him. In the end, men in general are visual creatures. We like to see what we’re getting ourselves into.”
Someone else commented along similar lines, saying that willingness to send nudes shows sexual openness.
“If I’m trying to hook up with somebody and they won’t send anything risqué or enticing, that shows me that I’m wasting my time looking for sex in this situation,” he wrote. “And doubly so if they won’t send a face pic, because that shows me they’re not comfortable exposing themselves to the world as a whole, and if we do wind up meeting, we are going to have to meet with me having absolutely no idea what they look like or what their intentions are. And that’s not safe.”
“So, I just ask what they look like naked. If they’re comfortable showing that, that means I have a good chance of hooking up with them, and even if I don’t hook up with them, then I know that they aren’t just wasting my time.”
But another commenter replied to point out that sending nudes can be a “huge risk,” since there’s always the possibility of those photos coming back to haunt the picture-taker.
“There are plenty of people who would hook up but don’t want to share their nudes, because they don’t know how those nudes [will] be used. … I don’t think sending nudes is wrong, but every time you do, you need to prepare for the possibility that someone you didn’t intend to see them may see them. The problem that I have with this discussion is the shaming of someone who doesn’t want to send nude pictures.”
That last point is worth repeating: As we’ve said before, you don’t need to apologize for not sending nudes. But for all you photographers and patrons of nudes out there, how would you describe the appeal of those steamy snapshots? Keep the conversation going in the comments below.
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KissBananaPeels
Never send a random person a nude pic, gay men have been saturated with nudes (online and other places) that many if NOT all gay men have NO respect for your nudes that you send!
Startrax99
Maybe, YOU, don’t have respect, don’t speak for others. You come across as ignorant.
bafoxe2
Look for a penis for the night on the Site -> hot4.app
Den
Phishing much, scumbag?
Bromancer7
Just make sure your face and any identifying tattoos aren’t visible in your nude pics.
wiggie
Men, regardless of orientation, are visual creatures. Which is why we get stimulated by things we see.
ggore
Bingo. Basic physiology, I am amazed that this did not get mentioned in the article. You can’t fight genetics and basic male biology, so just deal with it.
Prowelsh56
LOl ” what guys are packing” kinda tell a lot. For me…Sean Connery dressed in a suit can be fantastic…as with other guys. A well dressed man will likely get my attention. I know what a tool looks like….
abfab
Word.
bachy
I get that men are visual creatures, but there’s no way in hell I’m sending a full length nude photo of myself to a complete stranger. Regardless, I’ve had more hot sex than anyone deserves.
Every nude in those amateur photo galleries you come across online was sent by someone who was made to believe their privacy was assured. This opinion, however, is based on a pre-Facebook value system, wherein privacy was considered an asset to be valued and protected.
Neoprene
Yawn.
LumpyPillows
I have never sent a nude photo to anyone. I do have a few I took before I reached my dotage, but they have no use now except for me when I need to be reminded I wasn’t always an older man who has been discarded.
If someone wants to send me one, I don’t have a cow, but I’d rather have one that includes the face with a sly smile or knowing wink. Lord knows we’ve all seen so many random dicks that they have become trite.
Chrisk
If you’re on a sex site and you’re tooo insecure to reveal yourself naked then perhaps you’re on the wrong site.
ShiningSex
i guess if you’re on grindr and don’t want to share a nude, it’s either you’re small or ugly or both. Then they get the surprise when a big dick guy shows up and is ugly as sin. LOL
ShiningSex
If you’re on grindr just remember….bareback on that site is probably going to affect you in a way you don’t want. Be smart. Use protection!