sideshow

Don Jr. and Kimberly Guilfoyle are going on tour and you know it’s gonna be a sh*tshow

 

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Donald Trump Jr. and his fiancee Kimberly Guilfoyle are taking their sideshow act on the road.

The MAGA power couple are headlining the “American Freedom Tour” that kicks off in Florida this weekend. They will be appearing on stage with several other popular right wingnuts, including Jeanine Pirro, Kayleigh McEnany, and Dinesh D’Souza, among others.

Related: Don Jr.’s attempt to promoting his dad’s crappy new social media network totally backfires

The word “tour” is being used very loosely, however, since there are only two scheduled stops as of right now. The first will happen in Fort Lauderdale, Florida tomorrow and the second will happen somewhere in South Florida on March 19.

Per the event’s website:

The American Freedom Tour is coming to you! It’s time for conservatives to get motivated and defend freedom. For one historic day, the American Freedom tour will be in your city! Come see Donald Trump Jr, Mike Pompeo, Kayleigh McEnany, Judge Jeanine Pirro, Dinesh D’Souza and many, many more LIVE & IN PERSON. Get your tickets now. This is a historic, must-attend event featuring America’s top insiders and influencers, live-and-in-person. Register today. Build important relationships, help promote a conservative agenda and protect America’s future.

Tickets to this weekend’s sideshow aren’t cheap either. Nosebleed seats start at $45-$95, but if people want to get anywhere close to the stage, they’ll need to shovel out at least $195 per person. VIP passes go for $495 each. And Platinum tickets are $1,995 each. Plus fees, of course.

Related: The Jan. 6 committee has Kimberly Guilfoyle’s phone records and everyone is thinking the same thing

Tickets to next month’s event are slightly more affordable, but no less ridiculous, starting a $9 to sit in a crowded overflow room and going all the way up to $2,995 (plus almost $300 in fees) for a “Presidential” pass that includes free soft drinks, a selfie with Don Jr., and a bagel breakfast with Sarah Huckabee Sanders.

Related: Someone needs to inform Sarah Huckabee Sanders that she hasn’t actually been elected governor yet

This week, a judge in New York ordered Don Jr., along with his father and sister, to answer questions under oath about the Trump Organization’s business practices in the state attorney general’s civil probe of the company. The Trumps had been trying to block the subpoenas they received, arguing the investigation was politically motivated.

Graham Gremore is the Features Editor and a Staff Writer at Queerty. Follow him on Twitter @grahamgremore.